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Gue jalan jalan dan nemu joke yg mayan lucu :senyum:

UPGRADING girlfriend v: 1.0…

Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend v3.1 to GirlFriendPlus v1.0 (marketing name: Fiancee v1.0). Recently he upgraded Fiancee v1.0 to Wife v1.0 and it’s a memory hogger, has taken all his space; and Wife v1.0 must be running before he can do anything. Although he didn’t ask for them, Wife v1.0 came with Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw and BrotherInLaw.

Some features I’d like to see in the upcoming GirlFriend v4.0…

– A "Don’t remind me again" button
– Minimize button
– Shutdown feature
– An installshield feature so that Girlfriend4.0 can be completely uninstalled if so desired (so you don’t lose cache and other objects)

I tried running Girlfriend 2.0 with Girlfriend 1.0 still installed, they tried using the same I/O port and conflicted. Then I tried to uninstall Girlfriend 1.0 but it didn’t have an uninstall program. I tried to uninstall it by hand, but it put files in my system directory. Another thing that sucks — in all versions of Girlfriend that I’ve used is that it is totally "object orientated" and only supports hardware with gold plated contacts.

***** BUG WARNING ********
Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.1 will refuse to install, claiming insufficient resources. Boyfriend 1.0 came bug-free.

Software Problems!

I’m currently running the latest version of Girlfriend and I’ve been having some problems lately. I’ve been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 all along as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases have always conflicted with it. I hear that DrinkingBuddies won’t crash if you run GirlFriend in background mode with the sound turned off. But I’m embarrassed to say I can’t find the switch to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works okay. GirlFriend also seems to have a problem coexisting with my Golfprogram, often trying to abort Golf with some sort of timing incompatibility.

I probably should have stayed with GirlFriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance with GirlFriend 2.0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who has had experience with GirlFriend 2.0. He said that I probably didn’t have enough cache to run GirlFriend 2.0, and that eventually it would require a Token ring to run properly. He was right—as soon as I purged my cache, it uninstalled itself.

Shortly after that, I installed GirlFriend 3.0 beta. All the bugs were supposed to be gone, but the first time I used it it gave me a virus. I had to clean out my whole system and shut down for a while. I very cautiously upgraded to GirlFriend 4.0. This time I used a SCSI probe first and also installed a virus protection program. It worked okay for a while until I discovered that GirlFriend 1.0 was still in my system! Then I tried to run GirlFriend 1.0 again with GirlFriend 4.0 still installed, but GirlFriend 4.0 has a feature that I didn’t know about that automatically senses the presence of any other version of GirlFriend and communicates with it in some way, which results in the immediate removal of both versions!

The version I have right now works pretty well, but there are still some problems. Like all versions of GirlFriend, it is written in some obscure language that I can’t understand, much less reprogram. Frankly, I think there is too much attention paid to the look and feel rather than the desired functionality. Also, to get the best connections with your hardware, you usually have to use gold-plated contacts. And I’ve never liked how GirlFriend is totally "object-oriented".

A year ago, a friend of mine upgraded his version of GirlFriend to GirlFriendPlus 1.0, which is a Terminate and Stay Resident version of GirlFriend. He discovered that GirlFriendPlus 1.0 expires within a year if you don’t upgrade to Fiancee 1.0. So he did. But soon after that, he had to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a "huge resource hog". It has taken up all of his space, so he can’t load anything else. One of the primary reasons that he upgraded to Wife 1.0 is that it came bundled with FreeSexPlus 1.0. Well it turns out that the resource allocation module of Wife 1.0 sometimes prohibits access to FreeSexPlus, particularly the new Plug-Ins he wanted to try.

On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with MotherInLaw 1.0 which has an automatic pop-up feature that he can’t turn off. I told him to try installing Mistress 1.0, but he said that he heard if you try to run it without first uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.0 won’t install anyway due to insufficient resources.

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. There was no mention of this phenomenon on the product’s website or on its packaging at the time of purchase.

In addition, Wife 1.0 has installed itself into all my other programs, launching during system initialization and causing it to monitor all my other system activity. Applications such as Pokernight 4.5 and Beerbash 2.2.1 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot seem to purge Wife 1.0 from my system. I really enjoyed playing with Girlfriend 1.0 and I thought that upgrading would result in even greater enjoyment of the program. Now I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 1.0 but un-install does not work. Can you help me?

Concerned User

Dear Sir:

This is a very common problem men complain about but it is mostly due to the end user’s product misconception. Wife 1.0 is a great product but it is very high maintenance. Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. In actuality, Wife 1.0 is a OPERATING SYSTEM and was designed by its creator to run everything. It is impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 1.0 any more than you can go back to a 386 and DOS.

Some have tried to override the system by installing Girlfriend 2.0 over Wife 1.0, but they inevitably end up with greater problems than the ones they were trying to cure. (Look in your manual under Warning!: *Alimony/Child Support/Garnished Earnings). Having inadvertently installed Wife 1.0 myself some time ago, I recommend that you do what most users do, which is to keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. I also suggest that you read the entire manual section on General Protection Faults (GPFs). Basically, it tells you that you must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur. In most situations, the best course of action is to push Shift-Apologize-Reset as soon s lock-up occurs. Generally, the system will run smoothly for continued periods of time as long as you take the blame for all GPFs.Thank you for your query. If you have any additional questions, we recommend that you call your mother.

Tech Support

Top 10 reasons computers are male

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9. A better model is always just around the corner.
8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
6. They’ll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3. The lights are on but nobody’s home.
2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1. Size does matter

Here’s the quid pro quo:

Top 10 reasons compilers must be female:

10. Picky, picky, picky.
9. They hear what you say, but not what you mean.
8. Beauty is only shell deep.
7. When you ask what’s wrong, they say "nothing".
6. Can produce incorrect results with alarming speed.
5. Always turning simple statements into big productions.
4. Small talk is important.
3. You do the same thing for years, and suddenly it’s wrong.
2. They make you take the garbage out.
1. Miss a period and they go wild.

Hahhah Very funny, kalau loe mau liat lanjutannya bisa main main ke sini

Posted in Fun